Thursday 15 September 2011

I Live a Dream.

For some reason, I had quite a bit of people asking me, and polls asking public in general, what motivates me? Do I live my dreams?  Do I have a secret desire, not met by my current life?

This has made me think.  Why do I do what I do?  Why do I homeschool, when sending my kids to school should be such an easier option?  What is the real reason behind my homeschooling and being a house wife?
Don't I feel I miss something?

Truth be told, I did not plan to homeschool.  Yes, at one stage we did consider it, but that was while the big bratling was still a baby bratling and we lived out in the sticks.  At one stage, I did not even try to entertain the thought.  Just the mere idea of spending more time than needed in my kids company, was enough to drive me out the house.  You see, I suffered from depression, and could not face my responsibilities.

But, God send healing.  He took me on a long and sometimes excruciatingly painful path, but in the process, I found healing.  I can honestly say, that depression is no longer a demon in my life.  I've grown-up and learned to face my responsibilities, I have learned to face my troubles with God by my side.  That only in trusting Him, could I overcome my problems.  I learned to let go and let God.  It was not easy, it was not fun, but now, I have peace, for I know, no problem I face is to big for my God.

The biggest thing I realized after this time of healing was that I missed the cutest years of my two big bratlings lives, especially the middle one. I allowed Satan to steal that away from me.  I'm not making the same mistake this time round.  This time, I know what I have, and what I missed out on the first two times round.  I can't steal back that special moments lost, but I can make sure that I don't miss any more.

The homeschooling bit wasn't planned, as I previously said, but God had prepared me for it during this period of healing.  He placed in my life some wonderful homeschooling friends.  He literally closed the doors to good schools for my oldest bratling, forcing me to start homeschooling.  I was thrown into homeschooling, feet first into the deep end.  I had 1 month to get myself sorted, or so I thought.  I was adamant that it will be school at home, not homeschool.  Homeschool is too airy fairy!  Well, today I homeschool.  Academic work does get done, but we learn through play and life.  Man, did God know what He was doing or what? We love homeschool.  If only academics weren't needed.  ;)

I remember as a little girl, when the adults asked me what I wanted to be one day, my answer was always, "I want to be a mommy!"  I did not have to think twice about it.  As a teenager, I learned that, that is not an acceptable answer.  To be a housewife is an archive idea and should be banned.  My own mother, a housewife, told me off for not dreaming bigger.  God bless you with brains, so you must use it for something useful.  I was crushed... You mean that being a mommy is not useful?  It will have no merit, if I'm just a housewife?  You mean I must be super woman?  Have it all, the power, the job, the money, the kids, the husband, the dog?  I can't just be a happy, little woman at home, barefeet amongst her children and a farm full of animals, getting up to mischief with them?

I wanted to be there for my children.  See them grow up.  I wanted to bake mud cakes with them and secretly laugh at the naughtiness they get up to.  I could not wait to be a wife and mommy.  God blessed me with a husband who had the same ideas.  He too want the mother of his children too be there for his kids. 

Yes, life threw us some tough curve balls.  I had to work at one stage, but I managed to keep it to the mornings.  But I still had to send my very young babies out of the house for that time.  It broke my heart knowing someone else is teaching them the ABC and 123's.  We all hated the early morning rush to get them to school and for me to start my work.  It placed added pressure on my husband, when he felt incapable of giving me my dream, and his...

But, remember Who is in charge.  Yes, we did not always walk in obedience, but when we started to walk in obedience, the blessings started to flow in.  Soon, I was able to stop working, and even sooner than that, God place this wonderful blessing of homeschooling as part of our daily life.

He even blessed me with a third change to enjoy a little person, and this time He gave me my biggest wish, a little girl.  A princess for His Kingdom.  God, knowing my heart, have given me my every longing from childhood times.  Today, I am barefoot, getting up to mischief with my 3 beautiful bratlings.  I have the most amazing husband, and I look forward to growing old with my big brat, if it is God's will.  I enjoy every moment possible with him.  Our time together is super special to me, and I'll go to the end of the earth with him, if it is God's desire.

What motivates me?  My gratefulness to God, for giving me this special opportunity.  When the going gets tough, I remind myself how blessed I am, and then nothing looks like a problem.  I'm motivated by the love for my husband and kids.  Even my newly acquired 60year old brat.  They love me as I am, and I love them just one degree less than my love for God. 

I live my dream.  How can I not be motivated? 

Do I have certain secret desire not yet met by my current living?  Yes, I want more time and energy, to bake and create with my kids.  But I know, my girly bratling won't always be the toddling disaster on two legs.  The time will come soon, when I'll have less fires to put out and then I'll get the creative fires roaring.  Already, I'm getting more done than last year.

So yes, I'm blessed.  No, I don't lack anything.  There is no significant desires that makes me feel unsuccessful.  God has prospered me.  May I be a worthy steward of my minas.

Be blessed my good people.
From little old me.

Sunday 11 September 2011

Time to count the blessings.

Small blessings:
1.  The Springboks managed to win Wales in their first match, and we got to listen to the last 10 minutes of   the match on the radio after a wonderful morning at church. ;)  (That can probably count for two blessings.)
2.  There is two healthy new baby cockatiels in the avery. And more to come.
3.  I have at least one bratling back into normal school routine without too much hassles.

Big blessings:
1.  My girly bratling managed to escape getting chicken pox!  Thank you God!!!
2.  My stepdad's heart condition turned out to be something that can be managed with pills and he is doing much better.
3.  My friends who have had some major suffering with health problems in their household, have been blessed with some amazing healing from God. Things are starting to look up for them. 
4.  My other friends who have been struggling financially, have had some good news in that department. And God has started to provide for their needs. 
5.  There has been some great news and reasons for celebrations in our church when it comes to our church plant and some of our students that have moved on to their own churches.  Thank you God for blessing the work these people are doing for You.
6.  We thank the Lord for the safe arrival of yet another healthy baby for our friends and we await the safe delivery of another bundle of joy due any day now to some other dear friends of ours.
7.  I thank God for blessing me with the ability to serve Him at a time that would other wise have been wasted for me. This was a problem that was very heavy on my heart.
8.  I'm thankful that God blessed my adopted brat with safe travels and a good time this weekend.  I'm sure his gardian angels are looking forward to some rest tonight... Yes, this is a big blessing, for I don't think I can cope with disasters at the moment, and if you know him, disasters is something we expect at any time soon.

These are just some of the blessings in my life.  Now, before you leave your desk, write down your own little list of blessings and give thanks to God.  Start your week with a greatful heart and maybe, your Monday will not be so blue tomorrow.

Not much today, but just a little note to remind you all, God bless us everyday in little and big ways.
From little old me.

Saturday 10 September 2011

RUGBY WORLD CUP FEVER!!!

Now I know some of my friends don't have a clue what rugby is all about.  As a matter of fact my husband is one of them. But confession time once more.  I'm secretly a rugby fan.  Hard not be if you come from a family of avid rugby fans.  My dad's world came to a stand still with each rugby match played, and my one brother is showing the same symptoms. 

I don't get to follow rugby much, but I do like to listen to the matches as and when I can.  Wouldn't mind watching them, but you need someone to go with, which is not easy in this family.  Big brat don't like watching sport, the big bratling loves soccer and can't see why people think rugby is great and as for middle bratling and the bratling princess, they are still to young to take with.  My adopted brat, would not behave, so I'm not to sure if I should even consider it.  But there is light at the end of the tunnel.  Middle bratling is starting to develop an idea that he might like rugby. 

Along comes Rugby World Cup fever!  What a great time to show my middle bratling what the sport is really like.  Only thing is, he needs to watch it to learn, but where to watch if you don't have a TV?  Going to the big screen restuarants, costs money and they certainly don't serve biltong and naartjies, official rugby season cuisine.

To top it all off, with it happening in New Zealand and we being in SA, the Boks, our national team will be playing in the morning.  Not a problem really, except it is the Boks first and probably most important match for the knock out phase is happing on a Sunday! Smack bang in church time! How inconvinient is that?  So, unfortunately, I'll miss it. (Wonder how empty church is going to be tomorrow?)

Yes, I love rugby.  I'm all excited about supporting the Boks giving it a go to be first team to successfully defend their title.  I would love to watch each of their matches, cheering them on. I would make every effort to watch them play in the finals, even if it means going to a smokey pub!

But I do draw lines to how far I will go.  If it is going to be a situation of rugby vs God, then sorry, rugby will have to wait.  If it means I have to disobey my husband, or neglect my family, then rugby will have to be the one to go without me.  If it means that I'll miss out on that important goal to attend my family or God, then so be it.

Yes, I love rugby.  It is in my blood, but I will not allow it to consume me, no matter how great the game that is to be played.  No game is greater than the race I run to return to my home with God.  No team more important than my team at home to whom I am the first mate.

So to my fellow rugby fans:  don't loose sight on what is important in this time.  To the rest of you:  keep your priorities straight.  And if you place God first, your family firmly second before anything else, the blessings coming your way, will astound you. 

And if we win the Rugby World Cup once more and make history, then that will be a great blessing to our nation too. 

GO BOKKE!!!

From Little old me 

PS:  I hope to at least catch some of the 2nd half in action...

Wednesday 7 September 2011

Oh! The Woes of Returning to Normal Life!

I have to admit, I have been very bad at posting lately.  I blame it on jetlag.  For some reason, the last couple of weeks I just could not stay awake beyond 9pm and early mornings was a blur of getting back into the swing of school and everything. 

I love my holidays and trips, but I hate coming back.  Not that I don't absolutely love my house and to be home, it is the small issues that waits for your return that I hate. Especially those nasty surprises that costs you money.

And coming back mid term to all your childrens activities leaves a completely different taste.  Just when your kids are back in full swing, oops, it is school holidays again, and they fall out of swing again.  I love my kids martial arts teacher.  He only breaks up over the Silly Season in December/January.  I know that there will be no issues there.  But music is another story all together.  I'm surprised my kids teachers didn't say don't bother to come back for the term. 

My biggest frustration though is that the kids have no wish to go back to work!  Have you ever tried to motivate two boys to get back into school after a 9 week break?  It is pure hell.  I feel like a broken gramma phone the last two weeks.  "Do your work. Do your work. Do your work.  Are you done yet? Are you done yet? Are you done yet?  Finish up NOW! Finish up NOW!...."  Over and over again, day after day...
I know why they feel like it.  I do understand their feelings, but boys. we have to get back into school again.
And NO, you can't go on school holiday with the rest of the country!  You've just had an extended holiday!!!

As if dealing with the kids is not enough, the zoo decided to explode with more additions.  I have baby cockatails.  The ducks are breeding, and it seems like they finally managed to outwit the dogs, as Mrs. Quack is missing for most of the day and the dogs have not brought home any eggs. Anyone looking for either a cockatail or a duck?

My dogs managed to get themselves locked out today and in their attempt to get back in, chowed through the plastic mesh on the gate, that keeps the ducks in!  So that needs replacement prompto!  3 guesses who needs to deal with it?

The cats came home the other day riddled with fleas and ticks, thanks to the lovely field next door.  So it was de-flea-ing and deworming for all that needed to be done.

So between the zoo and the kids and broken' pcs and blocked up ponds and, and, and,  the only good thing that happened was the delivery of my wine. OK, I'm sure there were other things as well, just can't think of them.

So what blessing did I have the last couple of weeks?  Well, for one thing, better sleep.  Exhaution does that to you.  I managed to get some serious reorganisation done in areas that needed attention. And so far I managed to not get the flu doing the rounds in the house. Thank God for that, I don't think I could cope.  Now I just pray that my daughter manages to escape chicken pox, to which she was unwittingly expose to.  Her ears just got pierced and it would be a disaster if she develops chicken pox now.  At least that is one prayer, where all I can do is to trust in God. So there is my prayer and I'll let you know if God blessed me in answering this one too.

Now, I bit you all good night, as my eyes are struggling to focus.

From little old me to all you wonderful people out there.